New Year, Same Me, New Goal
O.M.G! 1999 was yesterday, right? The time goes by so quickly and that scares the shit out of me. Christmas break was full of sweet treats, little exercise and plenty of family time and I have zero regrets about any of it. That's life! I enjoyed it and moved on. So happy 2017! This year is going to be ridiculously AMAZING, right?!?!
*
First, I want to give a HUGE shout out to all the AMAZING ladies who have let me help them begin to live a healthy life. Some are just starting and some are continuing on their journey from last year! Either way, everyone is so excited and ready to make 2017 their year. My January Jumpstart Facebook group is off to a great start.
Secondly, yesterday I announced that I would be strapping on some high heels and a bikini to compete as a first time bikini competitor. You can view my video where I announced it to the FB world here. I have been thinking about this for a couple of years now but it wasn't always something I wanted to do. Previously, I never understood why any woman would ever want to do it. In fact, I was the girl thinking 'those girls just want attention. I wonder how many pervs watch them. That's so unhealthy...I bet they have to load up on illegal supplements, not eat and spend hours in the gym'. I think it's safe to say that I don't think that way anymore and it's because I actually have followed other women on Facebook who have competed. The end results is that it takes hard work, dedication, discipline (no quick fixes, nothing unhealthy) - which is exactly who I have become. No one is starving themselves or taking steroids (okay, maybe some people but not the ladies I follow nor will I ever be doing that). These ladies have been honest and have helped me understand the sport (like why in the heck does everyone need to have a super dark tan anyway?). *
I am a voice of continuing to improve on yourself mentally and physically and to always go after your dreams and goals...whatever they may be. Don't let anyone stop you not even yourself with whatever you want to accomplish. No matter how crazy your dream sounds work towards it every single day. Is my dream(s) for everyone? NO! Of course not. But I am not asking you to join me nor do I want to live your dreams...that's for you and only you to do! But you better believe that I will 100% support you no matter how crazy your dreams seem to me because women empowering other women is an AMAZING thing. I am SICK and TIRED of the bullying and the dream crushers in this world. Too many people don't do what they want to do because of fear...and mostly fear of what others will think of them (it's stopped me for years and years - do you think it was easy for me to tell everyone what I will be doing? NO! I know some of the negativity out there about competing but I'm going to do it anyway because I'm living for me and my life not anyone else's). The negativity has crushed us and will continue to crush us unless we do something about it. So if you want to paint/draw, open a bakery, create your own clothes line, write a book, join the army, become a coach or compete in a bikini competition GO FOR IT! As Nike would say JUST DO IT.
* When I first started living a healthier life all I wanted was to feel better. I mentioned this in my video (I felt like an 80 year old in a 25 year old body). In the video, I really wanted to continue to tell all of you what changed and how I have decided to do this bikini competition and more importantly WHY I want to do it but the water works came out and I just couldn't finish my sentences. Firstly, I feel GREAT and I am 100% comfortable with my body (which at one point in time I wasn't...in fact, I didn't love my body or myself - it's easy to say 'love yourself' but the reality is that it just doesn't happen over night). I am healthy. I eat all food groups and eat everything in moderation (except chips...I just can't trust myself with them). I don't skip meals and I do not purge meals. In fact, I never purged I just binge ate and honestly, I still catch myself binge eating at times. It is something I am not proud of but it's come a long way in the last few years so that's what I focus on - the positive. There is no point in looking back because we are all moving forward not backward. * Secondly, this is my goal. Not your goal nor do I think or expect you or anyone else to have to have a 'bikini body' to be healthy. In fact, if you know anything about me you would know that I 100% do not think this way. Healthy (just like unhealthy) comes in all shapes and sizes. I have worked and met quite a few people who have lost weight, gained muscle, toned up, gained weight, etc. to become a healthier more confident version of themselves. Those people all have different starting points and different goals and I have ALWAYS respected their goal. We are all shaped differently and we all feel our best at difference sizes. There is NO SUCH THING AS AN IDEAL SIZE. Don't listen to society and magazines instead start listening to yourself and what you want. * So, why the heck have I decided to do this? Well, I don't know if the answer is clear cut so instead I will tell you my story. I met a girl in university (Heather) who I thought looked FANTASTIC. We drank together (mostly - because do university students do anything else?) and of course with drinks comes food. I was always a bit jealous because I thought "this girl is partying just like me but she looks amazing and I have put on 50+ pounds since university"...little did I know that she felt like SHIT (drinking and eating greasy foods will do that to a person after a while no matter what size you are). During this time, I had started to take the steps to living a healthier life. I did the usual - join the gym, pick up some veggies (which was something that was never in my fridge) and cut out as much fast food as I could. Shortly afterwards, I noticed Heather started doing similar things. And of course, me not knowing any better thought "why is she doing all this...she looks great" and in a way I felt more miserable about myself and my efforts because I just thought since she looked so great she must already be in shape and things be effortless for her. Let me tell you, if you think that about me this is not true at all! It's not effortless and I still struggle to this day...and believe me I will continue to struggle BUT that's the magic about it. That's where you see results and that's where you see improvement. When you overcome those struggles you become stronger physically and mentally. Perfect never changes so don't be perfect because the best part of the journey is all the changes you see. As I followed Heather on social media (since we parted our ways after university), I became inspired by her. I became motivated by her. My jealously went away because I realized that it didn't matter what the person looked like on the outside. Her daily struggles were still similar to my daily struggles. The feelings were the same. * A year may have went by where I continued to huff and puff while at the gym and where I continued to constantly check Heather's Facebook page for updates on her progress. Finally, Heather announced that she would be joining her first bikini competition. My heart sunk! I was DEVASTATED. I wanted to stop following her. I didn't understand a damn thing. And I couldn't believe she would 'degrade' herself (because honestly, that's what I thought at the time because I just didn't know any better). But I didn't stop following her and for some reason deep down I decided I was going to support her even though I didn't agree with it. Let me tell you...that was one of the best decisions I ever made. She gave me more motivation and inspiration than ever before. I saw her hard work and dedication and realized that's all she was doing - giving it her all and leaving nothing behind. And more importantly she taught me a lot about the bikini competitor sport. I still remember talking to her in a Facebook message years ago. It was a casual conversation that led into me asking her questions about the sport and it was in that moment that I realized bikini competitions were not about 'pervs checking you out' or 'starving yourself' but instead it was about pushing your limits (in a safe way of course) in a sport that you compete against yourself and no one else (of course, on stage you compete against others but the biggest accomplishments are what you can do and how you can improve not comparing yourself to others and what they have been doing or are doing). That moment was when I thought "man, I have come so far in my journey I wonder if I could ever do what Heather is doing...she did it...so WHY NOT ME?" And that's when the seed in my head was planted. * Years past and Heather continued to compete. She had a love for this sport like no other. I eventually started following another girl who also competes and who lives in the same city as me. I know creepy, but I was interested and wanted to know more and she was willing to share her story. Stacey is someone like no other. This girl really opened up my eyes and has helped me believe in myself because I have seen what she has done and what she is doing. She tells it how it is...she has her bad days. She has her cheat meals. She is real. She is crazy. She is funny. And she is human. Stacey was the water and sunshine to my seed that had been planted. * Last year, I joined the Beachbody world. The at home workouts are amazing. The people are amazing. And I couldn't have asked for a better time to coach and workout with some incredible people (BTW YES, I AM STILL COACHING just in case you are wondering). These ladies REALLY showed me what empowering other women really means. Never in my entire life have I ever met incredible, wonderful, supporting people like them...they will support you in whatever you do (you better believe they are supporting me in my decision. In fact, in our team page this morning I had a shout out from my own Beachbody coach wishing me luck and telling me how excited she was to see my journey unfold)! Beachbody got me in shape. Those programs taught me what hard work and dedication can do. The programs worked. I got results. I started feeling really good in my body and coaching brought it to a whole new level. People often wonder where all my 'new found confidence' came from. My answer: Beachbody coaching! I swear, that if it wasn't for the last year of coaching there is no way in hell I would be doing this bikini competition. My coach gave me tons of training for the business and part of that training is for confidence (I think it work)! ;) * When I first joined as a coach, I told my coach "I want to do a bikini competition". I didn't know what to expect from her...she was a stranger so honestly, I didn't care if she laughed (I am most hurt when it's people I know who say hurtful things). Her response was something like this "that's amazing. You can totally do this in a year if you put your mind to it. In fact, some Beachbody coaches I know have also competed. I can get them in touch with you". I couldn't believe it - Beachbody coaches actually have done competitions. It perked my interest. Turns out Beachbody coaches do a lot (not just at home workouts)...name any type of physical activity and these ladies are probably doing it. They go to the gym.They do at home workouts. They competete. They bike. They run (one girl is training for the Boston marathon after 3 kids!). The swim. These ladies are where I get so much of my inspiration. Beachbody is what put the blossom on my plant from the seed that was planted by Heather and the sunshine, and water that Stacey gave it. * So this last year, I have been in close contact with some bikini competitors. I see what it takes and I just know I can do it. I love transformation and bettering myself but most importantly I love feeling great and that's what working out and eating healthy does - and yes! I plan on eating lots and working out and doing this the healthy way. Will I cheat? In fact, I have 1 cheat meal a week planned so I'm not going to be deprived either. I received my meal plan and workouts yesterday and I have extra cardio to do (which I have been wanting to do anyway because I am planning on a 1/2 marathon in the fall as long as everything goes smoothly so this will be perfect to train for it as well) and I have a TON of food to eat. It's pretty crazy and awesome all at the same time...at least it looks like a ton of food on paper (my stomach might think otherwise but we will see).
* So, why am I doing this? I'm doing this for me. I'm doing this for the people who are in the position I was in 5 years ago. I'm doing it to pass on knowledge about the sport. I'm doing it for everyone who can't physically and/or mentally do it but wish they could do it. I'm doing it because I simply can and want to do it. All I know is that if I don't do it I will regret it and I don't want to look back and be filled with regret. Life is about living not standing on the side lines. This year just seemed like the right time to do it. I feel good physically and mentally and ready for this challenge. I will tell all of you this...IF for some reason my body doesn't cooperate or if I end up mentally drained or have any health issues come up I will not do the competition. My health comes first and I plan on doing this the healthy way. My coach is a strong believer in doing things the healthy way as well and is actually one of the reasons I chose her. She is open to modifications for me and taking things day by day....which is exactly what I will need. <3 Thank you for all your support, love and encouraging words. You will see me transform over the next 16 weeks but my competition body won't be the body I keep forever. It's unrealistic. After the show, I do plan on doing some 'reverse dieting' to gain weight back in a healthy way. Keep your positive words coming because this is going to be one hell of a ride.
